IT CAME OUT of NOWHERE and I'M STILL in SHOCK....

Wow, I seriously can't believe this is my last time writing home as a missionary. Especially since it came out of nowhere and I'm still in shock. I've accepted it, but let's just say I've cried more in these past few days than I think I have in my entire life. (and I cry a LOT people, so that's saying something) : )

So it was a normal week up until Friday morning after weekly planning when I get a call saying that I have cambios....there were a few things wrong with this situation...  1. cambios don't happen in the morning in my mission   2. I had not even two weeks being back in Cuenca   3. I was being told that I was going to Guayaquil....with all my stuff....a place I was 100% I would never be going back to permanently because of my skin. So I call Hna Wiscomb (my zone's nurse) just bawling, asking her if they were sending me home. She couldn't even understand me I was crying so hard. She was like no! Definitely not, it's jsut a cambio! But I knew better.....sure enough when we get to Guayaquil and the assistants pick us up, drop us off at the nurses house to sleep, and tell us that we have to be at the temple the next morning at 7:30, it became even more obvious (everyone goes to the temple before going home.) Oh, and when I say we, I mean me and Hna ynoñan; she traveled with me : ) 

Abbie and Hermana Maria

So anyways, the Lord gave me a tender mercy in the temple! We were sitting in the chapel area waiting to enter the sealing room when who comes walking through the door? Hermana Maria from Monay!!!! The one who was seriously like my mother, who loves me so much and i love her so much : ) So I whisper-scream, Hna Maria! She looks at me and almost screamed for real out of the shock of seeing me there. haha She came rushing over, giving me a huge hug and so I had the opportunity to sit by her throughout the whole session. It was great : ) So then from there, we go to the capilla where everything mission-wide goes down. Where President is there at a meeting with the zone of the office Elders. We walk in, sit in the back, and then President looks at us, smiles sadly, and says that there's one more thing he needs to talk about before closing...and starts saying that if you need to go home for health reasons that it's ok, etc etc. So I start crying. Then when we sing the closing song, Hna Ynoñan starts crying too. 

Then President ushers us out and calls me into a room for an interview. I'm still crying btw cause I already know what's going to happen. But it was a good chat. President was really sweet, loving and gracious and just poured out the compliments so that helped : ) He told me that I had gone above and beyond, that the Lord has accepted my efforts, and that it's ok now. That I have nothing to be ashamed about as I have served a full honorable mission because a mission isn't about time, but what one does in the time that they are there, the time that the Lord gives them, and that I have accomplished more than many missionaries do in 24 months. He told me that I have been such a great example for the whole mission and that he wishes that all of his missionaries could be like me and show as much strength as I have, etc. I really don't feel like I live up to all that but it was all nice to hear.  But ya, I was still sobbing the whole time, because there were just so many emotions. But the conversation made me feel more at peace, and while I am absolutely heartbroken to be leaving, like seriously devastated, I know I just have to trust in the Lord and in his timing and in his plan for me. 

Oh so all that went down on Saturday. Sunday we just went to church, we helped the nurses in their sector, etc. Then today was just another roller coaster of emotions because it's the first Monday of the month.....which means consejo (the mission leadership meeting). President still made me go and had me bear my testimony at the end. Which pretty much announced to the whole entire mission (well all the leaders) that I was going home. I dreaded doing it, cried through the whole thing, so who knows if they even understood me. But then I got lots of love afterwards from the Hermanas so it was cool at least being able to say bye to lots of lifelong friends that I have made here : ) 

There are so many things that I'm going to miss about the mission and it breaks my heart that this part of my life is now over and that I have to leave Ecuador and all of my Ecuadorian loves (the people she has grown to love). But I want you all to know that I know this Church to be true with all of my heart and soul and I am so grateful to my Heavenly Father for giving me this time to serve him and the people of Ecuador. I love my Savior and have such a rooted testimony of the healing power of the miracle that is the atonement and the peace and comfort we can find through it. Jesus Christ is our elder brother, our best friend, our redeemer and our savior. It has been such a pleasure helping my brothers and sisters here in Ecuador come to know of these gospel truths. It was such a joy telling them that they have a Heavenly Father who loves them and that because he loves them, he sent his only begotten son to pay for OUR mistakes and OUR suffering so we could return to live with them after this life. And not only with them but with our families that we were given here in this life. We can become eternal familias, together forever, if we just obey the commandments that the Lord has given us and take advantage of the gift of the atonement in our lives. All our Heavenly Father wants for us is to be happy, which is why he has given us this wonderful gospel. All I want is for his children to be happy too, which is why I am so sad to be leaving this calling of preaching His happiness, but I know I will still be able to continue to do so in my daily life, just without a plaque. I'm so thankful for my wonderful, loving family and friends and for all of the encouragement, support and love you all have given me. I can't wait to see you all and be reunited : ) Prepare for the tears now....Para siempre dios este con vos.....

Con todo de mi amor,

Hermana Harper